Saving Mr. Banks...my thoughts

If you know me you know I love Disney! I love the Disney Movies, I love Disney World (never been to Disney Land or on a Disney Cruise but I'm sure I would love them too). But more than anything I love Walt Disney and his ability to create what he imagines. So it is no wonder one of my new favorite movies is Saving Mr. Banks.  Meghan and I got to see it last Sunday and I have been thinking about it ever since, watching other documentaries on P.L. Travers and the making of Disney's Mary Poppins.
As I watched the movie I ran the gamut of emotions. I laughed, I cried (I really wanted to do the ugly cry but held onto my man card and didn't do it). There was one line in the movie that I wish I would have been able to write down. (after some searching on the internet I found it) It came in the scene where Walt went to see Pamela Travers in London. He was explaining about his childhood and his relationship with his father. After explaining he said;

" Now, i don't tell you all this to make you sad Mrs. Travers, I don't. I love my life - it's a miracle. And I  loved my daddy, boy I loved him. But, there isn't a day goes by where I don't think of that little boy in the snow and old Elias with his fist and strap and I'm just so tired--I'm tired of remembering it that way...We all have our tales but don't you want to find a way to finish the story? Let it all go and have a life that isn't dictated by a past?"

That part of the story really hit home. No I'm not saying I had a mean father who beat me that's not what I'm getting at. The point I want to make with this is that we all have a past, everyone of us. Some worse than other. But how you remember it, what you make of it makes the difference.  I love how Walt says; "I'm tired of remembering it that way.." What is it in your life that you are remembering "that way..." Maybe it was an abusive parent or guardian, maybe it was a bully or mean kids at school. Maybe it is like the story of Helen Goff with an alcoholic father who died too young. Whatever the past is it is just that, the past. "Let it go and have a life that isn't dictated by the past."
How are you going to finish the story? By allowing your past to dictate your future, or by learning from the past, forgiving whoever you need to forgive, maybe that's yourself and use the past to change the future, for yourself and others.
Just a thought - hope it blesses you!

Side note - if you have not seen this movie please go see it. It is a wonderful movie and very well done. I hope it wins many awards. It really is one of the best movies I have ever seen. Just my two cents.

Are You a Clanging Cymbal?

1 Corinthians 13:1

New International Version (NIV)

13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 

I think John Maxwell said it best in his book Winning with People; "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."  Over the years I have realized how true this statement is. Not just how I view other people but how they view me. You can be the smartest person alive but unless I know you genuinely care for or about me and my well being I don't care about what you have to say.  I know that sounds harsh, but the same is true when you turn the statement around. If you don't think I care about your well being or you personally then you are not going to care about what I have to say either. There are several people who read this blog that I have never met and will likely never meet in my life time. But I write these blogs to help me and hopefully bless others who might be facing the same or similar situations in life.

Here's the funny thing about me, if you know me you would think that I am an extrovert and you would be right. I love being around people, I love people watching, I love being with my people... I'm not so good however with groups of people I don't know. I'm not good around people who are not my people. Don't get me wrong, I'm not rude. It just takes me a while to warm up to people and let them into my life so to speak.  I'm afraid this comes off as standoffish at times.

For example one weekend our senior pastor walked down to the 2 year old department to say hello to his grandchild. While he was there he talked to the volunteers in the room.  The Nursery director at the time came up after our pastor left and talked to the volunteers about how exciting it was to have the senior pastor come and talk to them. There response surprised me. They said that it was nice but that they would rather have me, the children's pastor, stop by and talk to them.  You see I always went by and talked to the kids in the classrooms, but rarely engaged the volunteers in conversation, thus making them feel unappreciated or unloved.  You see they didn't care how much I knew about Children's Ministry or anything else for that matter because I wasn't showing them love. I still go around to the different classrooms and talk with the kids, but now I am more aware of taking the time to talk with the volunteers in the rooms. I'm not fake about it, I am very grateful they are there and want to know more about each of them.

How are you doing with the people around you - are you a clanging cymbal, or are you showing genuine love? 

How to Have Longevity in Children's Ministry or any job you are called to do.

This is a blog post I wrote for my friend, Melanie Stone, you can check out her blog here: http://growchurches.com/how-to-have-longevity-in-childrens-ministry

I hope it will bless you!

My name is Scott Kinney and I am the Children’s Pastor at Seacoast Church in Mount Pleasant, SC. I have been on staff with Seacoast for 12+ years and have been involved with Children’s ministry in every possible capacity since I was 16 years old …and that was a long time ago! Over the years, I have faced frustration, aggravation, and burn-out. So, how am I still doing this after all those years? It’s kind of simple, it’s my calling.

Oh, I have wanted to walk away, not just from Children’s Ministry, but ministry all together. There were times in ministry that I thought it would be more fulfilling to work as a greeter at Wal-Mart. To be able to stand and say hello as folks walked by, give a smiley face sticker to a kid (do they even do that at Wal-Mart anymore?) or to point someone in the right direction. Yes, there have been times I wanted to give up ministry all together. The problem was… God hadn’t released me. In those times, I had to stop and realign myself with the calling God had placed on my life.  Here are some things I have learned over the years, when I wanted to throw in the towel and just give up.

·         Am I working at a job or a calling? – In those moments when I’m frustrated, God reminds me that HE has called me to this. It isn’t a job, it isn’t a career – it is a calling – and until he releases me from where he has called me, I am to keep on running the race that is before me. I have a poster that hangs on my bulletin board by my desk that was put out by Group Publishing a few years ago. It is titled “Job or Ministry?” I keep it there to remind me that “Some people have a job in the church, others involve themselves in ministry!” I never want my work for the Lord to become just a job – but to continue to do ministry for the One who called me.

·         Who am I working for? – Another thing I need to check myself on is who am I trying to please? Am I working to please my Senior Pastor, my Campus Pastor, my team, the children, the parents, my family, myself? …the list goes on and on! When I forget that God called me to Children’s Ministry and when I take focus off of pleasing Him, I get frustrated, mad and upset. I’m not talking just about Children’s Ministry programing, I’m also talking about things like: Am I wearing the right clothes? Do I have the right “look”? Am I still young and hip enough to do what I do? When I try to please man it makes me lose focus on what really matters. Only when I stop and realize the reason I do what I do is for an audience of ONE can I put things in perspective and refocus on my calling.

·         How is my God time? – I know what you are thinking, “you work for God, you’re always spending time with Him.” Not true. I can easily get wrapped up in thinking that because I am working on a weekend or midweek lesson that it counts as “quiet time with the Lord”. Nothing could be further from the truth. Now, there have been lots of times that God teaches me things when I am preparing a lesson, but it is not actually my time with God, it really is work. I need to regularly check myself and ask: Have I been spending time with God? Am I reading His word? Talking to Him? Listening to Him? It’s easy for me to talk to God, but to be still and listen to Him takes a lot more work on my end. If this is an area of my life and walk that is not so good, I might need to take some time away from the office and get things right with God first. I’m of no use to my team, or the children I’m responsible for, if I am not in alignment with God.  Another area of my God time is: Am I being fed? Am I attending regular worship services? I know after all my time in Children’s Ministry, it isn’t easy to get into attend a service on the weekends, so what we have started doing as a Children’s Ministry team is watching the message together on Monday morning. Fortunately for us here at Seacoast, we have an Online service and the online campus pastor set up a special service just for us to watch on Monday mornings.  However, if your church does not record weekend services, there are tons of churches out there that do – watch a podcast together as  a team or another online church service. However, it is not where we want to be as a team. Our goal is to have enough strong leaders (volunteers) leading the classrooms so that we can attend services with our families – that is the ultimate goal. So for now, we found a quick fix and that is attending together as a team on Monday mornings.

·         What is the enemy up to? – One other area I need to look at when I get to the point of giving up is: What is the enemy up to? We really do have an enemy in our lives. It’s not the kids or their parents. It’s not your boss, your co-workers, or even your spouse – there is a real enemy lurking about. The Bible says in John 10:10 that the thief (Satan) comes to steal, kill and destroy. What is it that the enemy is trying to steal from you? Your joy? The children in your ministry? What is he trying to kill? Your passion for serving kids and families? What is he trying to destroy? Your work? Your calling?  There are times when I want to throw in the towel and God reminds me of the enemy and tells me to stand my ground! Satan would like nothing more than to see all of us throw up our hands and say “we quit!” I would hate to quit and allow the enemy to win in the life of one of our kids. Remember Ephesians 6:10-18

¹⁰ A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. ¹² For we^[c] are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

¹³ Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. ¹⁴ Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. ¹⁵ For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.^{[d] 16} In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil.^{[e] 17} Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

¹⁸ Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.^[f]

So, let me wrap up by saying that Children’s Ministry is not easy and there will be times you want to throw in the towel and take a job at Wal-Mart, but don’t! You will be missing out on some of the most wonderful blessings you could ever imagine.

For those of you leading Children’s Ministry Directors, Ministers, or Pastors be sure to encourage them. Be sure to pour into them, love on them, and appreciate them. Watch for signs of burnout or frustration and step in and offer to help out. Help them to remember that they are called by God to do what they are doing. Remind them that they are working for an audience of ONE! Ask them how their time with God is going? Pray for them and against the attack of the enemy. They really are valuable to your church. I heard a Children’s Pastor once say; “You can do church without greeters and ushers – things might get crazy but you can do it. You can even do church without coffee and donuts. But try doing church without Children’s Ministry and things will shut down quickly.” Children’s Ministry isn’t babysitting anymore – it is hard work dealing with kids, parents and volunteers week after week. Show some love to your Children’s workers today – you’ll be glad you did.

 

O Come, O Come - thoughts about 2014 and adoption

Happy 2014 Everyone! I can't believe 2013 is gone and we are starting a new year! A new year with new beginnings and new adventures. I'm usually not overly excited about a new year, I mean its great we get to set new goals for ourselves at home and at work, but to me, its just other day. Well other than the fact that it is the one day of the year my family will put up with me cooking pork and sauerkraut, they can't stand the smell. However I am very excited about 2014 and the new adventures it holds for the Kinney Family. You see we started the adoption process back in November of 2012 and finished all the paperwork, home studies in November of 2013, now we wait. Not something I'm particularly good at, waiting. I don't even like to wait in line at the grocery store. But this is something I know will be worth waiting for.
After we finished the home study in November all I have been able to think about was the day we get the phone call saying they found two boys who would be suited for our family. Over Christmas I kept thinking it was like all those people awaiting the arrival of the Savior of the World, sadly some are still waiting. The song, O Come, O Come Emmanuel is one of my favorite Christmas Songs. The longing of the Messiah to come into the world - the waiting and expectations ring throughout the song. Now please don't think that I am waiting for two boys to join our family because I believe they will "save" us or that I liken them to Jesus. No I just think about how the people of the old testament longed for a Messiah and waited and waited with excitement and anticipation. "Will today be the day?" I can almost hear them say as they wake to start their daily chores.  I kind of feel like that. Every time the phone rings I think - Is that them calling with a placement? Its almost like when Meghan was pregnant, every time the phone rang and I saw it was her calling my first comment was not "Hello" it was "are you alright?"  I was that jumpy father to be, not just with the first child, with all four.  I'm that way again with the adoption - Is it time? Will today be the day? When will I hear something? What's taking so long?  But with all these questions the one thing I know for sure, without a shadow of a doubt is that God's timing is perfect. He's never early and He's never late - always just on time!
So it is with great expectations and excitement that I look forward to 2014 with the hopes of becoming a forever family for two boys.  So if you think about us during your prayer time, please say a prayer for the Kinney Family as we await the arrival of our new sons! O Come, O Come...